Wednesday, March 10, 2010

From the mailbag: I CALLED IT!

In the history of fake news, no pundit has ever celebrated being right with the glorious abandon Stephen Colbert brings to the task.  A typical segment has a clip from the previous show when the prediction is made (often as not, made as a joke), then comes the news where the prediction comes true, followed by a shower of red, white, and blue balloons descending as music plays a rousing election night ditty while the words I CALLED IT flash on the screen and Stephen cries out the same, arms raised in victory.
 

I occasionally get a “you called it” clipping, the most recent being last year when some false rumors were circulating that Halle Berry was pregnant.  A rumor she laid to rest by appearing on Jay Leno in a skin tight dress and, as the Gotham New York Post put it, “posing sideways for laughably longer than necessary.”  Yes, just like Selina in The Gotham Post 3 years before.  (Although, I’m not so sure about that longer than necessary part.  Thing is, guys, some of you boys employed by journalistic Posts are pretty damn dumb, and we can never really tell how long it will take you to grasp simple things.)


Anyway, that was last year.  Yesterday, I received a new one. I know newer readers aren’t that well versed on the early Cat-Tales, so I’ll just remind you that in the Book 2 Tale What’s New Pussycat, the female rogues embark on a Girl’s Night Out which takes them to a male strip join, as Batman and Nightwing listen in from above. 

“I have a question,” Nocturna, who had been quiet, finally spoke up. “Do performers of this sort ever don the apparel of the true denizens of Gotham Night?”

“She means,” Selina translated for the waiter, “are there dancers that dress like Batman and Robin, or Joker, or Two-Face?”

“There used to be a club like that in the Village,” their waiter answered. “It kept getting blown up.”

Nightwing looked at Batman.
Batman looked at Nightwing.
Crickets chirped.

Now first, let me be absolutely clear that I do not advocate the blowing up of anything, and if I did, it would be a purple mushroom cloud enveloping the aforementioned Gotham Post offices and not this dog and pony show.  That said…

I CALLED IT!!!

Warning, link is not worksafe, and, uh, if you do follow it, some of you should really, really not view the slideshow.   

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com 
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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