New Chapter Day!

Three words:  Chapter 4 - Racecar!

Yes, chapter 4 of Don’t Fear the Joker is upon us, with both couples returning to the Wayne Manor and Ha-Hacienda after the events of Chapter 3.  There’s been all kinds of speculation, but as soon as I get this posted… well, you’ll see. 

Speaking of the chapter release, it was time for a new update of Cat-Tales news for the little SitePal widget, and I had a bit of a time recording it.  You might not think it if you open the window, but apparently it’s Springtime out there.  At least as far as the pollen index.  Just enough to give me some oddball congestion in my one ear over the weekend.  Honest to god, felt like I just took a long plane ride and forgot to swallow.  So I’m really not sure how bad my voice sounded.  I do know it’s not the best time for plants to be getting on my bad side.  I mean, there’s a chapter 5 that comes after 4, and a chapter 6 that comes after that.  The title of the story is Don’t Fear the Joker.  You hear what I’m sayin’, Pammy?

Okay, moving on.  It’s hard to imagine there could be something more besides coming back from a hiatus with a shiny new Joker chapter, but if you check your calendars, you’ll see April 1 is coming up.  And it seems that since the first year that Gotham After Dark became the Metropolis Tourist Bureau, there’s a small, deeply disturbed following wondering what will happen next.  Not to worry, SDDFs, I found a few minutes to whip up something appropriate for the message boards.

And finally *checking the time* work will resume on that pesky TBA just as soon as the chapter is launched.  Which is why I can’t dawdle making this morning’s entry more amusing.  Ciaomeow, everybody.

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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Previously on Cat-Tales

Finished the book cover (MEOW!) and as promised, a normal Cat-Tales schedule has resumed. 

First, it’s quite true that a good editor is above rubies, and mine kept quietly working while I was running around calling down the wrath of the righteous on photoshop filters.  The result is that the proofing edits on Short Tales were ready just as soon as I came up for air.  And that means Cat-Tales #53, the shiny newly proofed trio of short tales which introduced The Z and Selina’s Lamborghini, is now available for kindle & mobi as well as the printable pdfs.   Again, I meow.

After that, work resumed on Don’t Fear the Joker, natch.  No ETA on Chapter 4 at the moment, but only because Joker and Harley are… well, you can probably guess. 

Twitterfeed HarlQuinn13
HarlQuinn13: Helping Puddin' test the Easy Bake Oven trap
HarlQuinn13: Test flopped.  Giving porcupine a decent burial
HarlQuinn13: Going out to White Castle

Work on the TBA is still on hold.  I want to get the next chapter in the can before I worry about any outside projects.  Happily the fan gallery artists and other extras folks are patient.  The folks I owe emails to, eh… well, I’ll get there.
So that’s it for now.  First major hurdle of the year, CLEARED!

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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From the mailbag: Just trying to help

I don't think it's betraying any confidences to reveal that some of the fans who email me have a less-than-flattering opinion of today's comic reader.  The general consensus is that anyone who would part with actual money for /insert the atrocity of your choice/ needs to be told things that, in our day, were considered too obvious to mention.  To that end:

Do not...

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com 
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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Previously on Cat-Tales...

Originally, this week’s blog was going to be more of a heartbeat message.  As I mentioned, I’m currently working on a client’s book cover and it doesn’t allow for a normal CT-schedule at all.  Got a little writing done, but not much.  Luckily, what this passing situation does allow for is little bubbles of opportunity where I can catch up answering emails and even put in some work on the TBA.  Both are the kind of thing where I don’t have to get into a mode, and can drop it in an instant when the phone rings.  So, moral: downtime in one area (the writing) doesn’t have to be downtime across the board.

So does that make this a “When life gives you lemons” entry?  Not really.  I don’t consider the bookcover lemons, for one thing.  I guess it’s just an ordinary Monday entry, closing out the books on a slow week and opening a new one what should be a much more exciting one.
My friends who visited EmeraldCon and MegaCon this weekend also remind us that the first of those two DC Actually-gets-it-right Classic-Purple-Balent-Costume Naughty-Grin Figures comes out at the end of the month, so make sure your comic shop knows you want one.  Meow.

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com 
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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Oh, FWIW, the friend at EmeraldCon said he was amazed at the money being spent, which is the best economic news I've heard in 2 years. Here's hoping - for Balent-Naughty Grin-Kitty and her whopping $99 price tag, sure, but also for those comic shops that have managed to weather the storm this long.

From the mailbag: I CALLED IT!

In the history of fake news, no pundit has ever celebrated being right with the glorious abandon Stephen Colbert brings to the task.  A typical segment has a clip from the previous show when the prediction is made (often as not, made as a joke), then comes the news where the prediction comes true, followed by a shower of red, white, and blue balloons descending as music plays a rousing election night ditty while the words I CALLED IT flash on the screen and Stephen cries out the same, arms raised in victory.

 

I occasionally get a “you called it” clipping, the most recent being last year when some false rumors were circulating that Halle Berry was pregnant.  A rumor she laid to rest by appearing on Jay Leno in a skin tight dress and, as the Gotham New York Post put it, “posing sideways for laughably longer than necessary.”  Yes, just like Selina in The Gotham Post 3 years before.  (Although, I’m not so sure about that longer than necessary part.  Thing is, guys, some of you boys employed by journalistic Posts are pretty damn dumb, and we can never really tell how long it will take you to grasp simple things.)

Anyway, that was last year.  Yesterday, I received a new one. I know newer readers aren’t that well versed on the early Cat-Tales, so I’ll just remind you that in the Book 2 Tale What’s New Pussycat, the female rogues embark on a Girl’s Night Out which takes them to a male strip join, as Batman and Nightwing listen in from above. 

“I have a question,” Nocturna, who had been quiet, finally spoke up. “Do performers of this sort ever don the apparel of the true denizens of Gotham Night?”

“She means,” Selina translated for the waiter, “are there dancers that dress like Batman and Robin, or Joker, or Two-Face?”

“There used to be a club like that in the Village,” their waiter answered. “It kept getting blown up.”

Nightwing looked at Batman.
Batman looked at Nightwing.
Crickets chirped.

Now first, let me be absolutely clear that I do not advocate the blowing up of anything, and if I did, it would be a purple mushroom cloud enveloping the aforementioned Gotham Post offices and not this dog and pony show.  That said…

I CALLED IT!!!

Warning, link is not worksafe, and, uh, if you do follow it, some of you should really, really not view the slideshow.   

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com 
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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Happy Anniversary Cat-Tales

9 years ago today, Reputation hit the cyber stands.  So Happy Anniversary to our favorite feline, and long may she purr.

As followers of this blog know, there is no big rollout of a new feature to mark the day.  Something is in the pipe, but it won’t be ready for another month or two.  Real life rearing its ugly, which is why this wasn’t the most productive week for CT.  However, I did finish the proofing edits on Vault, which means CT 52 is now available for Kindle & mobi. 

(Incidentally, Kindle folks who still want to test the compilation docs, that project will resume in a few months also.  PM or email me to get on the list, but be aware that nothing is happening until May – same real life/real work reason as above.)

Corporate Sugardaddy Watch:  DC, it’s official: Spiderman’s dad can beat up your dad, big time.  New York viewers missed the red carpet and 13 minutes of the Oscars telecast last night because ABC didn’t blink in the negotiations with Cablevision as the 8 o’clock deadline came and went.  One of the great advantages to being a sentient lifeform with higher reasoning skills, you have the capacity to learn from other people’s mistakes.  There’s a lesson here:  do not get into a pissing contest with the alpha mouse. Seriously.  Just don’t.  
Have a good week, everybody.

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com 
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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From the mailbag: Museum of Beauty

We all know Selina has a weakness for art and Bruce has one for cutting edge, high tech wizardry, so this find from a CT reader certainly speaks to both of them:

The Konica Minolta
Museum of Beauty

It takes a while to load - and it is well worth the wait.  This 3-D rendering of the Venus de Milo is presented as an interactive film with clickable hotspots that take you to breakout data with more detail on that particular point. The breakouts are not all that detailed, but the technology would certainly support more exhaustive information.

Meow.  This is one link which is very, very meow.

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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Resolutions

Not really.  That sounds way too formal, and more than a little binding.  In short, not feline.  But it is a new year, and there is nothing like a round number and days getting longer to give us all a nudge.  Time to turn over a new leaf and start doing all those things we should be doing.

Psychologically, it seems right.  Ironically, it probably isn’t a very good time.  Statistically, January is a month of depression setting in, and there’s a point in about 3 weeks where suicides spike.  I vaguely remember an analysis of it:  holiday bills come in, the high of new year hopes we feel now settles back into routine, tax documents start coming in the mail, and it’s still COLD.  The days are still short, the wind chill is still -3 degrees, and we know that it’s not going to be any better tomorrow.  Add it all together: moods plummet.  No wonder everybody goes off their resolution diet in a sugar-burning frenzy.  January sucks. 

Mr. Joker had some “unrealistic expectations” about Silly Putty.

Maybe the key is not to expect so much.  It’s still winter, those bills are going to come in, and we do all have to pay our taxes.   It’s not a NEW WORLD.  But it is a new year, and maybe we do approach our resolutions with a little more rationality and a little less emotion, we’ll have a better chance of sticking with them after the chain starts to pull. 

So, my Resolutions-aren’t-feline-but-if-there’s-time-I’ll-try for the online world:  this blog.  Writing the actual stories are still the first priority for my CT time, but  will make every effort to sneak in here to crank out one update per week. 

Beginning right now.  The holidays seem to break us down into two groups:  those with all the time in the world to kill after that last final, and those of us who need you to please-pretty-please stir the custard for the trifle, just for two minutes while we run to the ATM for some crisp bills for the doorman’s envelope—and while we’re out get a half dozen of those chocolate macaroon things for last minute thank yous—and oh yeah, find that youtube that showed how to make those curled ribbon decorations—better say five minutes.  Or, eh, ten, because I used up the last of the pickled ginger, too, so since I’m out…

I fall into the latter category, so as you probably guessed, not a lot of writing gets done over the holidays.  (Not a lot of email gets answered, either.  If you’re waiting, don’t worry, I’ll be through the backlog by Valentine’s Day, I’m sure.)

As it happens, I did finish a draft of the final chapter(s) of Do No Harm before the holiday crazy descended, so if my beta-brainstorm buddy comes through, it won’t be too long before we see an update there.  I say an update rather than a conclusion because I haven’t decided for sure if it will be presented as one chapter or two. 

While there is usually all kinds of extra busywork backstage when I’m going into a final chapter, I do have a head start in this case, since I had a title and a cover on deck for the “next” story when I was finishing up Demon’s in the Details, a next story that is not DNH.  The faux-flashback clip show was a last minute decision.  So, unless I change my mind again (always possible, but not likely in this case), the next title/cover is all ready.

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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Vancouver, Domino’s Pizza and You (know who you are)

Okay, who watched it?  This is supposed to be the Cat-Tales blog, and we’ll get to that in a second.  But first, who watched the closing ceremonies? 

For anyone who missed it, it began with what I can only described as “Previously on the Vancouver Winter Olympics…”  Lights up on those 3 raised prongs, with the fourth stubbornly in its Opening Ceremonies position of stubborn unraised stuckage.  Out comes what my stagehand friends are already dubbing “Techie-Clown”, who takes a hammer from his toolbelt and gets the thing into position, and on we go.

That’s just awesome.  It’s having the sense of humor to say “OOPS” on the big stage.  The world was watching, we dropped the ball big time, and we’re the first to laugh at it.  How can you  not love that? 

Then there’s Domino’s Pizza.  I was in (ironically) a pizza shop the other day and they had CNBC running.  Fourth quarter earnings from Domino’s Pizza are through the roof.  There’s this thoroughly depressing chart depicting fifty companies with the same basic type of customer in terms of income, geography, etc.  For the last 6 quarters, they’re all doing pretty much the same thing: down, down, down, down, and down.  No real surprise there.  Then, last month, there’s this one red line on the graph whose head pops up while everybody else goes down.  Domino’s.  WTF?  Domino’s?  Really?  Domino’s pizza?   Yep.  You know why?  The “we were making a really stinky product” campaign.  The “We were the only ones not admitting and now we are and we’re fixing it” campaign.  Domino’s own CEO came right out and said they were doing everything right in terms of corporate identity, advertising, logistics, business model, staffing—everything right except THE PRODUCT.  They problem wasn’t the advertising, the economy, or the staff, it was as fundamental as the crust, the sauce and the cheese.  They admitted it and then they fixed it.  Reward:  record profits.

I’m just sayin’. 

Okay, enough of that crap, back to CT.  It was a really good week for the Tales.  Chapter 3: Gallows Humor was released, and Jokers fans were pleased to see that even though this was laughing boy’s first major appearance since The Dark Knight, Cat-Tales Joker is still very much Cat-Tales Joker  (Accept no substitutes, Kiddies!  HAHAHAHAHAAAA!  Discontinue use if you experience sudden bouts of sanity or develop normal skin pigmentation.) 

IMO, the landmark Joker escapades in other media occur when Big J is trying to make a point.  From driving Jim Gordon crazy (to prove that all it takes to turn anybody into him is one really bad day) to the TDK Joker’s blow up the other ferry challenge (Milleresque attempt to prove everyone is just as corrupt, ugly and morally bankrupt as he is), the cruelty and carnage is not cruelty & carnage for its own sake.  It’s to make a point. That’s not something our CT Joker excels at.  He just doesn’t have the attention span, most days.  I’d say that’s a big reason he’s come to rely on Harley more than he ever planned to: she carries the one.  In Gallows Humor, he did have a point to begin with, but as BenRG noticed, he started having so much fun, the whys behind it got away from him.  Silly ass. 

Anyway, the chapter was very well received, and Jacker’s first foray into another rogue’s theme seems to have been sufficiently creepy.  The other development last week was that I finally got around to swapping out the old artwork on the website.  For those who aren’t aware, “Wanders Nowhere,” the CT insider who pens the Capes and Bats spinoff, is a fantastically talented cgi artist.  Last year he made a virtual Gotham City and allowed me to take a bunch of snapshots of our favorite feline in situ, prowling the rooftops as nature intended.  Those pictures have been sitting here on my harddrive for at least 6 months, waiting… waiting… waiting.  Finally I got around to popping them into place.  It’s nice to have a more realistic Catwoman up there, just to help with that division between The Post and Reality. 

Chris Dee
www.catwoman-cattales.com 
cattales.yuku.com
cattales.wikispaces.com

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